They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize
