The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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