so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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