I CAN MOONWALK!
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
