her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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