Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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