oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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