After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
