R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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