If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
