At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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