Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
