Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
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