I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
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