At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
