You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
