He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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