Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
