Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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