it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
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