We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
