..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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