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If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize