just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
