Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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