Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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