so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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