I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
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