Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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