first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
