If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
