But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
