Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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