i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
