a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize