If i come over, it means nothing
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
