just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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