that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
