I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
