1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
you win again, gameday.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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