Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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