I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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