Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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