We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
