I want to walk on stilts...naked
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Randomize
