When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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