seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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