My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
You need a sexual gate keeper
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
