She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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