Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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